


It Ends With A Kiss

by aflawedfashion



Category: Defiance (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-10-20
Packaged: 2020-12-24 11:10:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21098504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aflawedfashion/pseuds/aflawedfashion
Summary: Amanda experiences a moment of jealousy after she finds Nolan in the NeedWantAn AU to how Amanda and Nolan could have gotten together in season 3 (because while I like the canon version, I can enjoy an AU version too)





	It Ends With A Kiss

Even after getting reappointed mayor of Defiance, Amanda continued to enjoy the privilege of owning the NeedWant. It was her place to unwind, and although she had promoted a night porter to manage daily operations while she governed the town, she was in no rush to relinquish her 24-hour access to free alcohol and an escape from politics. 

After all, everyone needed to have a little fun in their life.

And while she usually found pride in her ability to be consumed by her work, Defiance was currently in the midst of one of the harshest, bleakest winters it had ever faced, and she was desperate for something to brighten up her life. So, on a blustery Tuesday night, she slipped behind the bar to mix herself a fruity cocktail that her sister had shown her to make many years earlier. 

“That’s not scotch,” came Nolan’s familiar voice from the balcony above as she combined her ingredients. “I thought you rejected anything that couldn’t knock a 200-pound man on his ass.”

Amanda looked up to see Nolan leaning over the railing, watching her with a bright smile. 

“Is that an invitation to a drinking game?” Amanda asked. “Because you know I’d win.”

“Oh, I know. I absolutely know.” 

As Amanda watched Nolan descend the winding staircase with a playful glimmer in his eyes, she indulged in a moment of romantic excitement before reality stepped between them to slap her in the face. Nolan was returning from the second floor of the NeedWant, and there was only one conclusion she could draw without deluding herself. Someone else had gotten to him before she had.

Amanda took a breath and pushed her jealousy aside. She was in no position to judge what a single man did with his free time, but the sting of knowing he was with someone else wasn’t logical. It was emotional. 

He may not have been her boyfriend, but she knew he had feelings for her, and she hadn’t seen him with anyone else in so long that she began to hope he was waiting for her. 

That once comforting hope now seemed foolish. She couldn’t expect him to wait for her when she never asked him to wait, when she had never even told him how she felt. 

“Seriously, what’s with the drink?” Nolan asked.

“It’s fun,” Amanda said. 

“It’s blue.” 

“A bright, happy blue that brings safe, harmless variety to my life on a dull winter night.”

“Well then, pour one for me while you’re at it, will ya.” Nolan dropped onto a bar stool. “I could use a little variety too.” 

“You look exhausted,” Amanda said as she mixed his drink.

“Long night,” he said, and Amanda bit back any further questions in fear she wouldn’t want to know the answers. “What are you still doing up?” he asked. 

“Couldn’t sleep.” 

He nodded. “It’s been a long few months for all of us.”

“Yes, it has.” Amanda’s sighed and sat down beside him. “But with these drinks, we can pretend we’re on a beach in Antarctica.”

“Sun.” 

“Sand.” 

“Sunset on the ocean.” 

Amanda smiled. “How romantic.” 

“You know me.” Nolan flashed Amanda a boyish grin as he held up his glass. “Always the romantic.” 

“And then there’s me.” Amanda playfully clinked her glass against his. “The coldhearted.” 

Nolan furrowed his brow, the smile falling from his face. “What are you talking about?” 

“Nothing.” Amanda shook her head, cursing herself for ruining their fun. “It’s nothing. Just forget about it.” 

“Amanda…” 

“Fine.” Amanda took a deep breath, unspoken feelings threatening to humiliate her. “Just look at me, Nolan. I have 3 living friends in this entire world, and I haven’t had a real boyfriend in over a decade.” 

“And…?” 

“And I don’t know… I don’t want to talk about it.” She forced herself to smile, trying to remember how she felt when she first saw him descending the stairs. “I just want to enjoy this moment.”

“Ok.” Nolan nodded. “But if you ever do want to talk.”

She rested her hand on top of his hand. “I know.”

“Good.” Nolan squeezed her hand reassuringly before taking a sip of his drink. “This almost makes up for what I just witnessed.”

“Most people tend to enjoy the view up there.” 

Nolan chuckled and took a gulp of his drink. “Most people don’t have my job.” He shook his head, looking disgusted and defeated.

“You were here on official business?”

“Of course,” Nolan said. “What, did you think I was up there screwing a prostitute?”

“I don’t know.” Amanda shrugged self consciously before staring into his eyes, searching for the truth of his feelings. “What else was I supposed to think?” 

Nolan smiled, leaning forward to brush her hair out of her face. “What we both already know.”

“And what’s that?” 

“That I have my eyes on someone else.” He paused, his intent undeniable. “Someone I won’t find up there anymore.” 

“Should I be worried?” she asked playfully, her confidence growing with every second he looked at her with a passion she hadn’t seen since he was tangled in her bedsheets.

“Amanda?”

“Yes?”

“I know you don’t want to talk.”

“I don’t.” Amanda’s heart thumped in her chest, anticipation pumping through her veins so intensely she hardly felt capable of making complete sentences. “I’m terrible at talking.”

“I happen to know that’s not true.” Nolan pulled her towards him, his nose brushing against hers as he paused on the precipice of a kiss. “Your speeches are the only reason I’m still in this town.  _ You  _ are the only reason I’m still in this town.”

“This is different.” 

“How?”

“This is a thousand times more terrifying.”

Nolan took a deep breath and asked, “Are you afraid of me?” 

“No, of course not.” Amanda closed her eyes and leaned her forehead against his. “Honestly, I don’t know what I’m afraid of.”

“I’ll wait for you to figure it out... if you want me to.” 

“No.” Amanda smiled. “I’ve waited long enough.” 

Amanda gripped the back of Nolan’s head, pulling him into a kiss that tasted of alcohol and eased every worry and every trepidation that had burdened her since their last kiss. She had let him go once, and she would never make that mistake again. 


End file.
